The Trio: Why the Harry Potter Super Team Would Make Terrible Detectives.

Ah the dream team. They sure did seem to luck in and save the day. But it struck me today that they are terrible detectives.

For one, in the Philosopher Stone the whole time they go on about Severus Snape. Sexy Severus! Now it doesn't take a genius to figure out that dark, brooding, Gothic, sarcastic, deep and slightly cynical Professor Snape is way to obvious a suspect to possibly be the ACTUAL cause of all chaos because as Professor Quirrell said you can often see Severus in all seven novels..."swooping about like an overgrown bat" . However a trained detective eye, or heck...a person with have a mind and a good sense of character could tell, talking to yourself, stuttering, not looking in peoples eyes, and the general weirdness of Quirrell is very suspicious. Even Hermione failed to notice the subtle hints that pointed in Quirrell's direction, even within all the testosterone-filled madness of the challenges you'd think the "brightest witch of this century" would think...hmmm...strange how there was a troll in the castle and Quirrell's trick happens to be a troll that happens to already been slayed...hmmm...how strange." Yet till the end they refuse to see the complete obvious. Good Auror skills right? We try not to blame them for that, as they are young "innocent" creatures.

Then rolls in the next year, fresh start for developing some new detective skills. Or is it. Trouble begins brewing at Hogwarts and its time for the trio to put on their thinking caps and get ready to sluth. This time (giving SOME credit to Hermione) Hermione didn't really think Malfoy was in on it in anyway (meaning to say Draco not Lucious-I mean Lucius-Malfoy) however her spunky little sid kicks believed hands down that the pointy chined Slytherin was the culprit of the heinous crimes in The Chamber of Secrets. Even though...franky at the time...Malfoy didn't have the brains to do what it took to do that. Especially when the world realised Harrykins was a Parseltongue, and Draco was shocked. DUH guys. Anyway, let's review the facts about the Malfoy's. Though EXTREMELY awesome espcially Lucius and his pimp cane used for child abuse, they are a boastful family. Harry, Ron, and Hermione said that they were. If they really were realted to dear old Slytherin, THEY WOULD TELL THE WORLD! Screw secrets, they would love to bask in the glory of being the heir to Slytherin. And once again these little rascals are picking the most OBVIOUS suspect. Little Draco is like a walking, talking foil. Dobby doesn't help matter either with the obviousness. Rich families only can afford house elves. However if Draco had done it, let's hope Draco would be smart enough to TELL Dobby NOT to tell Potter, we learn he does have a tiny ounce of brains in Half Blood Prince. All in all a pretty big fail on the part of the boys though Hermione did a good job. However once again they seemed to forget and skip over the obvious details.

Let us trek on. Prisoner of Askaban. Oh dear....not a lot of "suspecting" there eh. No reason to suspect anything. Oh dears. Our little friends at Hogwarts (minus Hermione once again) don't look at the CLUES! Everyone still seems to miss the big picture. I wont go into detail about this one but...Remus Lupin...gone at every full moony, Moony, Prongs, Wormtail. Rat living for years. So much evidence...so little smarts.

Etc, Etc. Half Blood Prince was the only book where Harry (silly little nit) got anything right! Only he had no smarts in tracking, and caught on to things too late. His reasonings for thinking Draco was foul were not really vallid ...just because he hated him really.

So all in all, I would be horrified if these kids became Aurors. TERRIFIED! Muggle cops maybe...but Aurors....eh.